Thursday, January 31, 2013

One of those days!

Tonight was hard...why?  Most days it doesn't drag me down, but tonight I broke down in tears at Ch!ck-fi-la.  We had K!ndermusik just like we do every Thursday night, but tonight Katie (Mallie's sweet mom) brought, whom I think was, her dad to class to watch Mallie.  I couldn't help but noticing how he watched his precious granddaughter and his eyes were filled with such joy when she laughed.  My heart hurts so bad because it is so hard for me to fathom that my daddy will not get to see Cora Jane on this side of Heaven.  I know he would have loved to have gone to watch Cora Jane if I had asked him to.  I can hear him laughing at her because she likes to dance in the middle of the circle during the hello song.  Then we get to Ch!ck-fi-la to eat dinner like we do every Thursday and this older dad walked by and just smiled at Cora Jane for being silly.  I lost it!  It hasn't helped that Cora Jane loves to play with my hair.  It brought back such fond memories, because I loved to play with my daddy's hair, including berets.  I wanted so badly for my daddy to spoil his granddaughter tens times more than he spoiled me (and I was one spoiled daddy's girl.)  I try not to ask why, but tonight on the way home I did ask why.  I don't want to question the Good Lord, but I need His comfort.  I pray every night that Cora Jane sees her Pop in her dreams.  Daddy how I miss you!

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